


Honey I Shrunk the HP Kids

by fojee



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 13:03:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9386471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fojee/pseuds/fojee
Summary: 7 very short drabbles of some Harry Potter characters written as children. (And in one case with a child.) Including my own personal goat-theory.





	

**Author's Note:**

> These were inspired by chibi pictures and kidfics. I think I posted it on some old HP website over ten years ago under a different pen-name.

*** Not very abused Harry Potter ***

Harry had brought home another lost dog.

"Padfut," he beamed at his cousin.

Dudley sneered, grabbing the leash from Harry's pudgy hands and pulling it closer to peer  
at the collar. "It's not called Padfut, you idiot. See it's named Precious."

"No! Padfut!" Harry's face screwed up into a pout. 

Dudley rolled his eyes. "Fine, call it Padfut if you want. Dad will still make you give it back. Wait, what's it doing?"

Harry bent down to look at the squatting poodle. "I think it's pooping on your shoe."

 

*** Draco's generosity ***

When the Malfoy family bonds, it involves manicures, pedicures, foot spa, facials, and an occasional full body massage. 

"We should get a bloody family package," Lucius complained while paying the bill.

Draco dug out of his pockets, pulling out a pate-flavored Bertie Bott jelly bean he had been saving for ages. "Here, Madame Akasha, for a job well done as always." He plonked it in his favorite masseuse's tip box. 

Madame Akasha smiled tightly. "A pleasure to serve, Master Draco."

Narcissa smiled at her darling's excellent manners.

 

*** Moody with a son ***

"Constant vigilance, my boy," Moody boomed out, as they tracked the scent of the strange animal. "Keep all your senses open. You should know the terrain and use it to your advantage." 

The boy suddenly yelped and shot forward, catching a small creature by the tail. It was black, with a white stripe down its back.

"Well done, boy." Moody clapped his son at the back, just before the skunk overwhelmed them and scampered away. "Now close those senses, boy," Moody said, eyes watering, even the magical one.

 

*** Sirius as a teenager ***

"Where did we go wrong, my love?" Mr. Black asked his wife.

"Don't blame me! You're the authority figure he desperately wanted to rebel against!" Mrs. Black's voice was strident with the capital T.

"It's those friends of his. Peer pressure has really destroyed the best and the brightest of children. They have led him astray!" Mr. Black shook his head at the state of affairs today.

"Oh, my poor Siri," Mrs. Black moaned. "My dear, misguided boy. We should have sent him to Durmstrang."

"Oh, no dear. That's even worse. You know what they say about those all-boys' schools." Mr. Black tapped the side of his nose. "The boy ending up fighting for Dumbledore is preferable to--"

"To him playing for the other side?" Mrs. Black asked archly.

Bellatrix interrupted her aunt and uncle. "I think Sirius swings both ways."

Mr. and Mrs. Black exchanged glances. "Slytherin blood will out."

 

*** Filch as a kid ***

Filch raised his hand in class. "Sir, Mr. Jenkins is chewing gum, sir."

"Thank you Argus," the teacher said before ordering Timothy Jenkins to spit out the gum.

"Tattle-tale," someone whispered.

Filch raised his hand. "Sir, Mr. Patricks called me names, sir."

 

*** Hagrid and The Talk ***

"Dad, where do babies come from?" Rubeus asked his father one night while he was being tucked in bed. 

Mr. Hagrid cleared his throat nervously. "Well, son, babies are delivered to their parents' doorsteps by storks from the baby factory." 

"A stork carried me all the way here?" Rubeus asked.

Mr. Hagrid chuckled. "Storks are just one example. Many animals can deliver babies. In your case, son, a giant roc delivered you here. But in some places, a hippogriff can deliver babies, or three-headed dogs, or even dragons."

Rubeus fell asleep dreaming of a dragon carefully carrying a baby in a basket.

 

*** Albus as a young criminal mastermind ***

"I want a lemon drop!" Albus banged on the table.

"No, dear, you'll ruin your dinner!" Mrs. Dumbledore admonished her son. "And Aberforth, stop playing with that goat! Wash your hands. You don't know where that goat's been." She called out the window.

A twinkle entered Albus's eye. He concentrated really hard. A second later, Mrs. Dumbledore screamed and ran out to separate her son from the poor goat. "Where did you learn such a vile disgusting act?"

Albus smiled, getting a handful of lemon drops from the can. This wandless magic was really easy.


End file.
